I hope you're the one

I know it's been hard
for you to accept me
in my attitude like this
have patience on me

As time passes by
and after all the late night calls
I've realised that
you'll be the one to break my falls

However there are still something
I took it deep into my heart
the way you killed me with your words
slicing away my heart

You may not know it
but I had longed for the calls everynight
because I knew
it would make me sleep tight

someday I really hope
that you'd realise the cause
of me doing this to you
while our relationship is put to the pause

Knowing me better
is what you had longed for
your success
is what im hoping for

I don't care what you are
nor do I care what you do
I just need someone trustworthy
and I hope its you

:) Wierdy Wonka aka Amyique haha...

guys....

Hey gals, don't u think tt boys are irritating? that's bcoz they r immature. for example my brother in sec 2 now, he is trying to be macho but actually he is not. it seems so pathetic. He always look over my shoulder to see what im doing at the pc. like can i have some privacy??? at least i dun do that to him cos i know when he ons the com, he'll be playin runescape. i dun know y he isnt tired of that game after playing for mo than 2 yrs now! some guys are also kpo like my father. everything that i have, is a must have for him. i think it rus in the family for guys. and some guys, usually our 'friends', interrogates us. where we go, what we do, who we see, when did it happen and it all never ends. i wonder what if there were no guys at all in this universe... Choy! then only homosexuals and girls are left! nonono! touchwood!

Daymn....

today i feel disturbed. i actually like chocolates... real ones... like van houten, wonka, and cadbury... i still love hangin at the park... cycling... but i hate ppl who think of themselves, so self-centered... like what the heck is this all abt? i hate ppl who everytime we have to follow them, do what they ask for... ppl who dont know how to look at themselves... i hate ppl who i slow in receiving info or is basically acting dumb or is clever but actually quite dumb... i love to hear emo songs so if anybody sees hip hop songs in my fone, thats my bro's fault... he likes hiphop... same like my cuz there in aust. Zul's his name. he's damn cool... he's fifteen now.like my sis and danial, my cuz. My cuz lili, (danial's sis) is currently having a crush on danial who acts in s.m.s the suria show. haha... i think she's too old for him. lolz. u wanna know y i feel disturbed? im currently bothered by someone whom i think has the 'i hate' characteristics. like wth...

haizsssss

I dun feel good these days i don't have any idea whats happening to me. my life is changing rapidly everyday and im tired... at mind, physically and at heart. i'm just so tired i wanna sleep for a week. besides staying home all day long for almost 2/3 of my life and answering qns, doing things, again and again... like there's no end to dis. I think im depressed lah. Ya i think so. Only way is to run... By being solo in this house like a dud. im going to start praying to god very hard tommorow... hope that He would show me the way to the truth.... i'll never give up praying. so ppl.... if i dun answer ur calls or if i dun go online that frequently... im so damn sorry. btw... "behind inner beauty, there r a thousand secrets" so guys... try figuring out yourself cos we women find it hard to explain all.... its a thousand not a hundred...

-woohoo!-

K this com is so damn sot... now i have to retype the whole post! But nvm... Today Azeez, Zariff and I went to darul ma'awa to volunteer ourselves as tutors/befrienders. Then we went to play poolat dntn east, saw amalina at Ben and jerry's. she's werkin there, Des is working at giordano. zariff is a very cool player at pool and he has the gothic look lor...

-sorry...-

Once, I wanted to be wid him... However, he killed me hard deep inside just at the beginning. He had never told me that he had someone in his life currently. He's the one i tried to trust after 3 years of denial.
It started out fine but feelings started to grow. i know he had felt the same way too. But from a trusted friend's mouth did I hear that he belonged to someone else. (Of course if you guys were in my shoes, you should have felt that freinds r to be trusted than someone else especially if it's a guy.) I had been wondering then, why still contact with each other when there's no end? It's like a waste of time if u think through it carefully. What will happen to us then?
He told me one day then, that i'm specail to him. he would do anything to open my heart for him even when i have forgiven him. I asked himto wait... maybe my heart will cure by itself.
But after our conversation last nite, the whole picture changed. I thought there will be hope for us but unfortunately, he destroyed it. Now i don't have any feelings for him. not a teeny bit. Now he is somewhat of a burden to me. Askin me out even if i dun want to and takin no for an answer.i just hope he would forget about loving me. he slashed a suffering heart which was dying and poof... there it lies in a body that still moves and craves for trust.....

heart

It was only 13 days after we met and he told me we had not met each otha for a long time. We have been talkin ova the phone every nite and these eyebagswere caused by him... haha... but I dun blame him...hmmz... I dunno how to describe my feelings for him rite now. Since he lied to me, I can't give my trust to him. He keeps askin me to open my heart for him. But i find it impossible. Last time I did admire him but now... I have no feelings for him. But... let's wait for another 6 to 10 yrs... maybe by then, if god is willing, and if we still contact each otha... maybe we can see if my heart is opened for him.

that guy....

Hey... k I've got this tale to tell. I've been like contacting this guy for like a few mths now and at first, I liked him cos i thot i felt comfy wid him. Things changed when I found out that he lied to me... So then... I started wid my 'don't trust guys' attitude which had been wid me for like 3 yrs now. Yesterday, we talked over the phone. um... he confessed abouut his feelings towards me... (I've known that before by my superiority to see ppl's actions and body language... haha!) so I told him my part of the story. We came to a conclusion that he'll wait for me for six years until Iwould b his gal. then I have to wait for him for 8 and a half yrs cos he wants to take double degree. so we came to another conclusion which states that we would wait for each othe for 10 yrs... haha... but... during that long period of tym, of coz we'll have our own freedom... now we r just friends. I asked him to wait for abt 6 yrs coz umm... i wanted to fulfil my parents wishes. My parents and my family are my first priority that if let's say my family or parent's dont approve of him, then I will be willing to sacrifice my love for him just to make them happy... that's how much I love them... and also, i will take care of them all my life, i will care for them... i wont let them slip off my hands even if my future husband doesn't approve of me taking care of them. cos if he does, I will ask for a divorce. If he talks much, then I'll leave him even if he doesn't want to let me go. To me, my parents r much more important coz they were the one's who brought me up... with their sweat and sacrifices. they r the ones who made my unique character... so whoever wants to be my future husband... BEWARE!