what i want... what i have...

I dont know what is happening to me right now... the old me is back...
maybe, i didn't even changed... maybe I had just kept myself... not letting
it out... you wanna know how I know? in the middle of my heroes show, azeez
logged in... my status was away... like he should know that i'm busy... why
would I put my status to away or busy for no reason??? i know some may do
that for no reason but not me... (okay one big mosquito had just fed on my
blood and there's three spots... so itchy!) anyways back to my story, he
logged in and said... hi. ok then i took a while to reply him to show that
im busy... so i said hi back. he then asked "bz?".. -_-" what does it look
like??? gosh its bothering me... him... our issue... i don't like him
anymore... i don't trust him... well it's his fault... partially mine... but
i hate it! i wanna start anew... open a new chapter in my life... only me my
family friends... but not with him in chapter 1, 2 or 3... if he was in my
book, the last phrase in the book would be "...and they lived happily n'ever
after"...

ok now im getting crappy... but every girl... lady... woman... wants a guy
of her life or at least a guy friend to be:
1) intelligent.
he obviously have to know how to win our heart. by winning our heart, who
wouldn't fall for him? he must know how to take care of our fragile heart...
girls are quite sensitive... don't they know that? and most importantly, he
doesn't ask questions which has obvious answers. if i am bz, i am bz...
don't bother me!

2) A leader
A girl would want a guy who is better than her... he would be a guidance to
her...

3) Not childish
A girl likes attention. we like guys to buy for us stuffs... some don't like
guys to buy stuffs for them frequently but some does... but not me... i dunt
like too many presents... haha...
some guys just want attention... like a girl... hello? guys are supposed to
be macho. you don't need affection from girls... you are the one who is
supposed to give it to us... not the other way round! e.g. some guys sulk...
eww.. mcm kedi

As soon i get to think of other features girls would want their bfs or
special friends to have, i'll blog it down. but now i wanna tell you about
myself... my new image that im going to start...

as some would know... since young i had many evolutions of myself.
age 1-4: so girly
age 5-11: tomboy giler...
age 12-14: back to a girl... but cared more abt my image... bought facial
products and all to take care of my face. haha..
age 15-16: busy studying so i didn't care about my image...
but now: age 12-14 will be coming back!!! just went shopping at guardian
to buy some hygienic bodycare and facial wash stuffs and some make-up...
don't laugh... you'll cry... haha... at least i wont look like a maid when i
go out... (when with make-up) gonna findout great way to style up my hair...
maybe just improve on somethings uh... buy hairband or stuffs like that so
that i wont look like a guy... haha... wth... so lets hope that this
evolution of mine will work out... speaking of which, i have to buy ZA
concealer... these eyebags are freaking me out... haha... goodbye ugly mirra
and hello princess!!!

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my future... i wish

God I really want to work at Islamic countries like Dubai when I have finished my degree... but one big problem, i don't even know what degree should i take... but you know what, i'm the kind of person who goes with the flow... i can accept things... i will just try to chase my dreams of working at Dubai... if i know i don't deserve it, i won't cry or dwell about it... the most important thing is that i had tried my best... i'll give my hundred percent and push myself as i did during my 'o' levels... i am the kind of person who believes in fate... i know you can change fate by hard work and prayers... but if it wasn't meant for me, then what can i do? i just need to try harder... i may not be perfect... neither can you but the way you try and push yourself is the measurement for how perfect you are... lets try that theory for a while and see if it works... but i know being too over confident is out of the list... you have to remain constant... how i wish i can go to motivational courses once every year so i won't forget the ways of gaining and clutching success...

phew!!!

I confessed all my worryings to azeez... he understands and i told him
stuffs. my weaknesses and all... and he considered us as special friends....
the moment i saw that word on my screen, there was a sudden flashback! I
remembered that I still don't trust him! oh God! thank you! if not... i
dunno what were to become of me. then i told him that the "special" part is
still under consideration and i knew he was quite disheartened... i just
know it... but after what we had went through, i still don't think he
deserves me. lol. wtf am i talking abt??? i also dunno... ok wtv. luckily i
didn't say any further if not, i'd die...
God must love me... cos if not, why did He remind me of what happened to us
earlier? ahah... im so glad He loves me... I love him too... But i seem to
make Him unhappy lately... haiz... how i wish i was not easily taken in by
the devil's whisperings... I'd do something about it.
ya i just told Azeez that i feel so lonely... it's true... you know when
there are no friends beside you... though they r just a phone call away, the
umph have died... when we don't see each other's eyes... it hurts thinking
about how lonely you are without friends. but hey... some are far worst... i
still have my close friends like wan, zima, farah... lynn pon skrg dah bz...
mizie and all... oh how i missed those memorable times...
And now... i dunno what i should tell you guys... cos i feel blank. there's
nothing inside me... except for those whom i cherish... im hungry actually
thats y.... haha... hmms... tv is so boring nowadays... but i still watch
Danielle... and Heroes... but i try not watching too much of it... its too
addictive! haha... my haha is like laughing like an idiot... God... i feel
so lonely... pls send me a pleasant guy worth looking for to knock on the
door of my heart... a guy of my dreams.... night2

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yesssaaa!!!!

ok i watched heroes episode 7 and 8 already... got it from dailymotion.com
cool webby... more better than alluc.org... haha... so glad i have a bright
lit brain and a very sharp eye... thank you Allah for the extraordinary
things that you presented me with... my cleverness, my family, my life, my
belief in you... You make my life more meaningful... if only some others
were like me... our name wouldn't be polluted... not that i feel good about
myself but hey! i haven't put shame on my parent's name. and i believe some
of you and some of my friends out there haven't to... well, its good that we
didn't... may we stay guided by Him always so that we can be put in the
"good people" category when we leave this world.
well im gg offline now...
PS: Azeez why r u playin hide and seek???? argh! dumb noob!@#$%^&*

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shitty

ok now its damn warm i am perspiring... and as i am typing this entry, i am
wondering also what the rest of my friends are doing... guess it must be
quite fun working unlike me... like a lazy bee... you guys are one busy
bee... now i am trying to watch Heroes ep 7 but i have a hard time buffering
the video... haizzz... if this doesn't happen, im going to switch to "ugly
betty"! haha! that widya is now getting me into ugly betty... wth... now
this isnt happening! the buffering is still 0%! oh no after 3 minutes, its
3%... must i wait for 100 mins? oh gosh... maybe ill just wait and find
other things to do like hmm... watch ugly betty! haha! "happy haloween!...
haha" k i'll update yall when i have the tyme again... i hope so!

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the weather.... hmmms....

ok... so now im still wondering if it is gonna rain or is it gonna shine...
rain? shine? hope it rains... atleast then i will have a perfect excuse not
to go to SATA... i am waiting for farah so that we can go to SATA
together.... hmms... i just hate to go to polyclinics or clinics... i hate
to wait! i can't stand it sitting for hours doing nothing that im sure of!
oh gosh...

well let's just come up with an excuse... "i thought i was going to rain and
the umbrella's broken" (for my mom) and "my period prolonged for some three
days so i had to come on a later date and can't submit my report on time"
for polytechnic... but i dun think they'll care... as long as my report
comes in, it'll be fine... but of course im going to submit it ard the first
week of april... haha... i dun wanna get myself into some deep shit of
trouble and make my future a pile of shit just because i was late in
submitting my medical report... haha...

now i'm in boredom mood... my moods are random... it took me so long to wake
up from my lalaland this morning... i woke up at 8.30 just because my mom
told me to and then i went outside to the hall and lied down while reading
yesterday's Berita Harian half asleep... i couldn't make up the words! so i
slept in the hall for an hour till my mom came back from the market... as
soon as i hear her footsteps i ran to the kitchen to grab the broom and
immediately swept the floor... you don't know what mom's can do to you...
haha ok enough of that crap!

My plan for today is to watch another two episodes of Heroes... then im
gonna view blogs of my friends and Filza's blog coz her behaviour is like
the same as mine and we have many similarities... so i wanna find out how
far similar are the both of us... so catch ya later!

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hehe... filza's cravings...

ok widya's fiance's lil sis, filza... is chatting wid me rite now... and
she's like all over with her "obnoxious weight" which i find it fine... i
read through her blog, since i'm a big Kaypoh! and i found out she had uber
cravings... mcm org mengandung! ya allah! macam mana nak kurangkan berat
badan kalau ikutkan sangat idaman... haiz...
then i gave her that example of a pregnant lady... she haven't reply yet cos
she's eating! oh god... pls guide her so that she can control her cravings
and her big appetite since she needs to lose weight for her interview...
haha... and not forgetting widya who will be going for an interview at some
place i forgot where... hope she gets the job... i'm waiting for her to be
online...
And the drilling's not stopping! ahhhh... noisy... any idea why i dun like
to go out? especially during sunny days? you know that on sunday, during our
family bbq, in the afternoon... with my ayam face (cos i had to do the
chickens in the morning lol), the sun was having its toll on me... it was
like damn hot sia! i was hiding under the gazebo and the shelter nearby for
like most of the time! haha... low blood pressure lah... i felt like
fainting even in the gazebo... haiyoz what has come over me?
im still wondering if its gonna rain or not... luckily i hsve put in the
laundry... but is it gonna rain? it looks like it going to but i dunno...
the weather is so funny this days...
and you know, i the morning just now, me, nani, miza, ibu and mika went to
Whitesands... for breakfast at mac... since ibu wanted to buy fish from
NTUC, we went there instead of Elias mall... then on the way, nani and miza
talked... miza is my younger sis', nani, best friend... they talked about
they're dream cars and nani, the mini siti nurhaliza, said to miza that she
wanted to drive a car like siti's. the Peugeot 307. in her words... "Kita
nak beli kereta yang macam siti nurhaliza uh... yang convertible... atas
boleh buka punye"... so cute... but the convertible was pronounce as
"comfortable" lol... see thats what she gets from talking to me, the car
freak, good descriptive words for cars... haha... you gotta long way to go
nani... long way... me too actually, i wanna get an Aston Martin roadster...
gotta find a tycoons son to get me that... lol...

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the noise again!!!

ugh! guess what? they r drilling the whole block again... gosh so noisy... i can't even hear what the characters in heroes are saying! i was lip reading but unfortunately, lip reading wasn't my forte... so... i just had to make out the spanish subtitles... hah... just kidding... i dunno how lah but i can get the story some how... just like reading comics... in some comics, there's no words... just pictures... yea.. i watched heroes as if it was a silent movie... wth!
now my com lag because of live msgr... downloaded the new version and the com lags... haiz... wtv lah... then azeez sent me an sms early in the morning... ask to go out for dinner... haha... im not free lah dey...why would you wanna go out for dinner with me?
I envy him sometimes cos he is so understanding and so patient with me... i keep shooting my mouth at him and he keeps being patient... if i was him, i'd leave that girl, which is me, immediately! haha!
Gosh... that time at SATA he smsed me asking if i have feelings for anyone... just to be sure, i asked farah and azimah... since they were with me at that time... and i trust them even for my life... so i asked them lah... then they gave me the "you're such a blur-block" face and said "oi! nampak sah he wants you"... i was like... okaaayy... i didn't know how to react! i dun even know if i like him. but i'm sure i dun have feelings for him.. help... then Mas'ud pon satu hal... i dunno to whom i should go to... i don't know Mas'ud that well... I know azeez well enough but i dun trust him... oh gosh i'm in a dilemma... or the best solution is to focus on my studies... haha! thats a perfect choice!

bbq @ prp

i had just came home from bbq at PRP... Nani's b'dae... so fun but tiring... fun cos many ppl were there... tiring becos we had to layan all the ppl.. haha... but it was a wonderful moment... nani got many presents... danial got an adidas watch from his sis and a $1.50 drink from me... haha... wth... the rest i dunno... lol.
Filza and Iylia's mom was there... we chatted like we never met... chatting with them was fun man... like talking to myself and my mom... me (weirdo), mom ( the weirdo's advisor)... but unfortunately, the weirdo doesnt listen to the advisor... when something goes wrong with the weirdo's decision, the weirdo will put the blame on the advisor... get the pic?
lol

Oh God!!!

Many things are running through my head!!! poly admission thingy, my sis b'dae party... ahh!!! although i am not doing anything rite now, my head is like spinning... taking a deep breath mite work...
i'm currently thinking of my dream home. it will be perfect for me and my future family... i so hope so... haha... hope fate will be by my side to let me achieve my dreams...

4E4 Chalet!!! :D

sorry bout not updating you guys yesterday. i know some girls out there are wondering what happened at the class 4e4 bbq yesterday night, who went, was it fun and all... well to tell you, it was a shame that you couldn't make it... It was damn fun lorr... Even though there wasn't much to do but still fun...
I didn't thot of going at first cos it was raining. Then i called Lina Fong to ask who was there. She told me ther wasn't many ppl at that time but i heard Desiree shouting at the background asking me too come. Then I pitied her. since i told her i was coming, so why don't i just go. The rain was getting lighter anyway. So i took a bus there. When i reached at the bus stop, i walked like a gundu minding my own business then went to the pushcart route to find huixin shouting out my name. some didn't recognize me due to my hair lol. i cut it mah. they were sitting outside "funkyball" the pool arcade. so i asked them why they were there. They told me desiree and lina is inside "funkyball". Then y are they waiting outside? "because we don't like the place". that reply gave me a shock of my life. like hello! its not a bar or a club. it is quite a quiet place. hah wtv.
So i went in. without showing my Ic.. wth. just go lah i'm 16 anyway. then i saw Des playing with zainul at the corner. so i approached them. Saw nick tan, luqman and lina too... and then i asked des for the room key since the guys outside wanted it so bad.lol. then i passed it to them and went in again. played a game with des. so nervous cos luqman watching. haha... haiyoz. i dunno y. dun ask me. Zainul was funny and lame. his hands were like a pianist's. so soft. i lost to des. well i was nervous.
Then it was time to go back to the chalet. we dropped by some shops. then there was no bbq. it was just a chalet. but Des told us to bring $10. so we used that money to buy food uh. our own food. lol. too bad i didn't take some pics. i was too happy to take them. wth -_-"..
Then we played cards. the air con sots. call the technician then okay oready. but leaking. uhhhh..... we talked and talked and disturb ppl. play guitar... Zainul and his lame jokes... he asked "Why nevr rent xbox game?" des was like "now then you tell me???!!!" haha... what a cute couple.. hehe... george and fit were labeled bad hair day guys cos their hair was long. lol.
When it was time to eat, we went to KFC. the guys stayed at the chalet with some 4e3 guys. Zainul went to buy for them food.. take away. and went back to the chalet. Me, naqia, amanda, mei hsien, mizie, and george ate at kfc itself wile lina, nick, des and jack went to Whitesands or something... Mizie left early. so 5 of us were left. We went back to the chalet to find all the guys inside. we didn't go in... the room was full... and furthermore, what is there to do? then i brought them to play pool, if it was okay.. i mean that was the only the fun thing to do... it was 9.30 and the arcade were packed with ppl. so we went in since it was with good ppl to them... me and naqia played the first game while the others fetched their ic from the chalet. she won cos i accidentally pocketed the black ball in... haiyos!
as we played, at around ten, the malay guys came in... syamim and zahir and all lah. they took the table beside ours. so some watched us play and the ones who weren.t playing at our table, watched them play. Zahir was quite good... zainul still needed some practice.
Fit was helping us (me and naqqy) teach the chinese ppl how to play. he then offered me to challenge with him 1 on 1 during the last 10 minutes b4 the arcade closes at 10.30. Maybe he wanted to play with me after seeing me give tips at the chinese guys where to shoot, slicing and all... so we played the game uh. it was a fast one with my good thinking skills Vs his strength, we played. eventually he won... i lost to him by one ball... oh gosh... all because of a "bola mati". i couldnt shoot my balls!!! so he got free ball and shot them into the pocket ending our game. i couldnt believe i had the chance to defeat a good player like him! haha so happy though i didnt win. his standard of playing was much higher than mine! im a beginner but going to be ameteur... haha... he ameteur going to be expert! wth... then it was time to go for me... called my father and he fetched me... i thot i was going home straight... "wo hen lei" mah... so tired... but we went to fetch my mom and came home at two... go jln kayu and eat roti prata while i hear al-quraan recitation from my mp3... haha wth!

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hahahaha

ok the post just now was due to my depression... haha... rite now i am so bored... have to wait for my mom... basically everybody who is online dun seem to layan me except mas, iz, and wan... haha... wth... now im listening to music fom imeem... hmms... i can compose my own songs now... haha... thats cool! hahakz. ok what shall i do now???

the crows..

under the void deck at my house, i was attacked by crows! the crows thot i was provoking one of their friend. who is blocking the way of the road... so i shooed it with newspaper. to my horror, the crows came attacking me! ahhh! luckily only two and i got to duck their attacks... haha!

The SATA @ uttamran... (seriously i thot it was ultraman)

I woke up at 7.30... the earliest time ever to wake up throughout the hols... haha... excited mah... so long nvr go out. lol kesian budak nie. anyways, i thot only farah and me was going but i also had thought of asking azimah along. so i did. so at ard 7.55am, farah called to extend the time to 9 am. ok. so i had time to do my hair.cool. then i called azimah.she say she wanted to come. confirm. after waxing up my hair, i went out uh. then zima smsed me. she said she cant go coz she havent made an appointment. then i told her that she need not make an appointment cos i called the clinic and the operator said so.
org dah kluar rumah, dier belom mandi!!! ahh!!! so i made my way to whitesands for breakfast. ate fillet meal. and the sight of a yellow eyed bird, the typical yellow beaked bird you can see, totally freaked me out.. since the last incident with crows. lol...
so there's this one yellow eyed bird standing on the chair infront of me. it has only one leg! so kesian... i know it was waiting for my food. the sight of it made me uneasy. ican't eat if i pity something infront of me. so i left some burger into the package and i drank half of the milo. 'oh gosh! im such a small eater!' i thought to myself and came up with one idea which is to open a restaurant called 'small food for small eaters'... haha sempat... ok put that aside...
while waiting for azimah at mac, i saw some of my 4e4 classmates. Muhaimin, Zahir and another one. Hafiz mohd nasir... my neighbour last time and the kpo guy who told mdm mariambe that i wont be coming to her remidial class bcus my father didnt let me so... haha!
so funny lah he... last time so short. now quite tall huh... hmm... that time i had seen him at tp open house too... when he see me he smile... luckily he smile. if not i report to his mom.. hahaha! aper jer... ok...
then Azimah came. we walked past the guys to make our way to the MRT. met farah at bedok mrt... then we head off to chaichee... we went to the interchange to see the bus service and which stop we should get off. ok so we took bus 222.. but the bus went the whole round into bedok south. then it came back to the mrt station bus stop at bedok. then it moved to some other few bus stops before stopping at the stop where we wanted it to stop. i knew that sata was in between chai chee block 1 and pingyi sec. so i straight away pressed the bell when i saw chaichee block two. haha. i thot block one was some where there but block one was further uphill... haha.. padan azizah cakap dia mcm kat atas bukit! ok then i thanked god we didnt get lost. i thot we were the only three going to SATA since it seems like we were the only three. but on the way as we went up the hill, a large group of ppl ran towards the gate of the Clinic. I was like what the heck??? it was sure it was gonna be a long wait.indeed it was... haha... but saw george and had some fun talking with farah and azimah. then we were like blurblocks over there only the nurses knew.. well whatever it is, it will sure be an unforgettable experience... haha...
i have to go there back for urine test and report collection on friday. Haiz... but it was fun... hmmz.. tomorrow got class gathering yea!!! so look forward to meeting 4e4 peeps! haha..

 

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Singapore Mega Expo!

hey... just got back from makam habib noh, my grandma's house at AMK and singapore Mega Expo! my father was involved in some launching of telemovie "pawang putih pawang merah" haha... quite fun but tiring lor... here's some pics!



my bro with rahima rahim jr... his friend's hand shaky uh...



my parents, cik jun and one of the actress... aminah ahmad.

i sat with othman hamzah and nick mikhail... so funny lor the other comedians behind me and rahimah rahim was playful on stage! she hid so many party poppers in her pocket. used some for the launch and others to pop for the others and herself when they were taking the souvenirs from the producer... so cute lor! hahahaha... and i also got to camwhore... ish3...

7 things i wanna do!

Firstly, I don't want to learn mandarin....

Secondly, i want to take both car and motorcycle license, not for transporting people but my family and friends... no strangers... only idiots do that...

Thirdly, I am quite happy with my physique that Allah initially gave me.

Fourth, I wanna enjoy life with my family rather than go swimming... its not like im gonna swim and have that same phisique throughout my whole life... tutup aurat pls...

Fifth, I wanna get my degree in architecture...

Sixth, i dun wanna work for the government. only if i an forced to or have to.

Seventh, build my own empire in malaysia and live there with my family...

yeah!

yes! my uncle let me use his laptop for a while, while waiting for my mom to buy me a new one... which is like i'm not sure if they would... noway im bringing this to poly... its so damn heavy lorr... 2.5 kg leh... but i still thank god and him for letting me use his laptop... i was in search for the ethernet wire so that my lil sibs can surf the enet thru the com and we won't have to take turns to use the wire... our modem got 4 jacks for ethernet wire... i thot of it while i was entangling the wires of the modem which was so messed up with the other wires of the com. haha... there i was hanging around in the internet waiting for someone to give me his spare ethernet wire... and indeed someone called wan came to the rescue... he ended my search but he is unsure of the location of the wire... i hope he finds it... why does he always come to my rescue? well, that's what friends are for!

i found a new weirdie!!!!

I just hate friendster's new look... it's so confusing for a technophobe like me... haiyo... I dunno why but i have alimited friends quota of only 29! any idea of how pathetic that is??? maybe it's the com prob... anyway, i saw Filza's (my kakak sedara, widya nyer tunang, iylia nyer adik) profile... it turns out that we both have the same interests.... but the only thing is that she likes to read and i dunt. my gosh! did fifan just jumped thru the gate hole which is abt 1m high???? cool! i can put her in a circus! and my mom would probably kill me... anyway... i saw filza before. she came to my house for hari raya. she's ok... weird like me... like to talk abt things that ppl dun usually talk about like NASA? haha... wtv... we have the kental look but we're okay.... just too brainy for our looks... haha

Our Band...

Ghost of Juliet... quite a nice name... i cant wait till we get together and take pics... i want negative pics of us! so cool... and btw... told my parents about my band. as expected they gave the green light to continue... so yeah... to me it's cool having parents who supports me and i appreciate it...
At least i dun have to hide from them... niwaes they wldn't like it if i hide anything from them.
there's songs to write and compose before we can make and album... haha as if... makin an album needs money man... loads of it... but i guess if we join reality shows, popularity and makin money wouldn't be a prob... just need confidence and practice. so I hope we can show ourselves to the world!!!

chewing, chewing, chewing,chewing, chewing gum!

First and foremost, I'd like to thank Wan and Azimah for helping me with my blog. Wan, it looks damn beautiful and unique to me... If i could only change the pic of that girl up there to me, it'll be more fantastic... I don't know why but I make it a routine to check on Wan's blog everyday....
I'm chewing my bubble gum right now and it's the most horrifying, displeasing and outrageous thing that I've ever done. I only do this when I'm depressed. Healthy way of DE-stressing yourself but it uncontrollably disgusting... Okay you know what, I'm gonna throw this thing away... Hold on... Bluek... Now I'm feeling nauseous... The idea of you still chewing the gum when all the flavor are gone is revolting! It's like you are drinking your own saliva! Eww...
I think there's wind inside my stomach... You know what? I was so damn tired today I didn't solat for the whole day. Well that doesn't count Ishak... cos it's only 8.15 now... and Ishak is like 8.27... Maybe I'll just payback tomorrow. My head is spinning... that explains the descriptive words today... I'm trying to gain focus. i think today I am a walking vegetable. I so don't feel too well... And today Arina has gone to Malacca... should be reaching home soon..
I can't wait till school starts... I'm rotting at home with nothing to do... wonder how dis interesting and boring it is to suffer in this house like a decomposing and rotting body? (like real!) haha... just kidding... I'm actually bored right now... trying to put my brain in its original manner.
You know my sec 4 classmate, Naqia always tell me that I an suffering from Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) just because I am vain and like to touch my hair. ...And that maybe sometimes I get bit weird and funny or shall I say strange till i freak her out... Hey! Did you see? My father is In the Bongkar advertisement at Suria... Hahaha! so funny... Ouh... it's supposed to be serious. sorry father... (hehehe...)
You know what? The cockroach is still lying dead and upside-down on the floor where i left it dead... except that my mother kicked it out of the house just now.... but its still there... outside... do cockroaches have 9 lives like cats do??? and you know what? my two cats can't be bothered. One (fifan) always sleep and the other one (gemok) would watch the cockroach running and do nothing about it... wth???
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Chewing gum is really gross,
Chewing gum I hate the most!
-Willy Wonka

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me....

cool in a negative way that is....



my new look after i had chopped off my long moppy hair...

cockroach.... crab... centipede.. hornet??

ok you know about me and i hate big flying insects... ok now on the 2 walls beside me which is 1m away, ther's a big cockroach and i know its flying cos it came from yesterday! now i'm afraid it would fly at me! what should i do???? arghhhh!!!! help!!!!
currently chatting with raudhah, a long time friend i've looked up upon to, and she told me... if it flies you fly too! huh?
haha... very funnny...
ok! now its gone! ahhh where has it gone to???
i remembered when i used to live at pasir Ris 517, there used to be a big flying cockroach in the bathroom in the mornings and i was so petrified i didn't want to go to school. but mom came to the rescue and hit that thing with a broom. it flew all around the bath room... i forgot what happen after that... but i remember going to school though...

ok wan told me just now i had a crude sense of humour while we were chatting about "assuming".

wan: ppl assumes because its either they are too shy to get the truth first hand or the truth is unaccessible..
Amirah: lol
Amirah: then its better to have an opinion
Amirah: like i think
Amirah: i think... you're cute
Amirah: not
Amirah: you're cute
Amirah: but actually u're not
Amirah: theres a diff impact
wan: *what a crude sence of humour u gt there..
Amirah: lol
Amirah: roflmfao

haha was that a compliment or what?

i remember a cockroach crawled across my leg in side the banket i was hiding in! ahhhh!!!! but luckily it doesnt hurt like a centipede does...
i had been stung by a centipede before... it was at bedok after swimming. i fell onto a grass patch and the centipede was crawling on my leg! it crawled until below my knee when my mother push it away. oh how brave of my mother.
then i remember when i was stung by a hornet. at changi beach. it was so damn big. it was dark so i did not see it among the dark green grasses. i was wearing slippers you see and when i got stung, i was like yelli and screaming... shouting of pain and scared. came to this one point when a tourist sitting shouted, "are you ok?" i ignored him... i was running towards my father. and he ticked off the sting which was stuck at my big toe. i could see his hands shaking. but i think he knew he needed to save me. ouh i'm so glad i got brave parents.
i got pinced by a small crab too! i was playing with the one i caught. and then to my horror it pinced me! what the heck i tried to pull it out but the hand came off... so sorry... k i killed that roch in 5 mins oready since it came nearer... it took 5 long minutes!!!

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Gosh!

I so happen to be not in the mood to talk to any guys today although there are two guys who asked me to call them. Mas'ud and Azeez... sorry guys... it's just that i'm thinkin of how sad my father is right now... he's at work you see... he wanted to bring my phone cos my sim card incoming call is free... my mom always call him when she gets back from work. But, tomorrow morning my sister needs to use the phone to bring it to melacca. Girl guide stuff... so there's a phone dillema... and ties btw my sis and my father has not been well these few days... my sis and her rebellious side... i hate it seeing my parents unhappy... so sad... luckily i can bring a smile to their faces.
My grandma at ang mo kio is planning to make a gathering during the weekends since i have passed my 'o's... alhamdullillah... berkat doa semua yang mendoakan... i'm so damn happy with my results that i still cant get over it...
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Oh Allah, Creator of the universe, The Almighty who Hears our prayers, please show the path of truth to my sister Putri Nur Arina, so as she could be a daughter who is obedient and respectful to her parents. Give her faith that she could be a better person and save her from Evil for it destroys her manners. Oh Allah, there's no other God besides you, please hear her sorrows. For you are the Listener, please make my prayers a reality. Save us in this world and thereafter.

Phew!

God! After 2 hrs of dwelling with the template and downloading stuffs... at last... my blog skin is changed! thanks to azimah and wan that is... im quite a technophobe but when it comes t games, i'm all on! so i was supposed to follow my lil sis to bugis cos she needs to buy some souvenirs for the malaysians. she's going to melacca to help with the flood victims... girl guides thing... ya so i did not follow... wth... hahaha... i hope they're ok... i think if i go there, i'd be lost... anyway... i'm so excited for enrolment. Environment design... cool... its a pity that some got into the waiting list. the JC eligible students took the popular courses... but its their life their choice. maybe they wanted that course in the poly so bad that they worked so damn hard and got themselves eligible for JC. they deserve it... unlike some who know that their points are low but they still opt for popular courses... of course you would get into the waiting list. i'm not making fun of them or having the last laugh but this is reality... you want it, work! So I hope that these people would learn from this.

Ok, guess what? in the afternoon, i tried to update the blog. But, when i wanted to publish, the com suddenly not responding!!! after my hard time figuring what to type and typin down those things, i can't publish them! ouh how i hate some technology.... destroys my day. And just now, i had a little tummy prob until now. i had just wanted to make coffee for my father when this prob came... my stomach still hurts... its been so warm lately i was perspiring in the toilet...

 

well i hope my father wont feel hurt... i had a reason...

 

ok enough with that... i so feel like i wanna cry... you know when u're in holiday from school, you're the only one at home, the ppl feel like your the maid... you do everything... the household chores and all... and these people come home from school and play the com, eat, sleep.... and i have to clean up after their mess!!!!!!! oh Allah! pls give me strength!

 

Ok... i think i feel much better now... I see a strong bond on me my father and my mother... thats good... but my sis and my father, they quarrelled just because my sis doesnt wanna heed my father's advise... well she is the person the whole household is "afraid" of... she's violent and her words are so sharp.

 

I hope you guys would be more aware about whats happening in this world... especially the wars going on regarding our religion... look out.... taubat! k lah gtg i wanna take some medicine....

 

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hmm...

i just did some research about Islam...i was too interested that i forgot the time! so now i m chatting wid wan... yesterday i was so lethargic and moody that it lagged until this morning. then somehow i remembered i have to read about the webby wan gave me. so i did... it feels much better... oh no i just finished my pepsi+coke drink... oh gosh... I'm so hungry but don't feel like eating. hmms... i have nothing to do right now thats y im blogging....

 

So now im back to my religious self. Alhamdullillah... (my 5 yr old bro who could barely talk properly is singging Pump It!! Wth...) I'm planning to read the tafsr tonite or later. hope i wont forget. Thanks wan for recommending me the webby.... maybe laterat night I'll update somemore. I dunno what to type about.... hmmz....

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The World

so freakin stressed out today. i dunno y... maybe bcuz of the flu im having, had to follow my mom go jemputan then go vivo for what i dunno.  so tiring... then now waiting for Wan to finish his solat before we can continue our chat about some World stuff.... sometimes i wish if i can save the world. makin the world what its meant to be at first.... ammending whats right whats wrong... but i guess... let Allah do the job. I just plan... he determines it.... later its my turn to solat. i wanna do it but this setan is whispering to me... "you can do your prayers later" i think i'm trying so hard to resist it... i wanna make IT cry... seing me do my prayers... i got this one phrase from a malaysian ceramah for teenagers saying, "do not procrastinate in doing anything. the Devil whispers to ur ear so that you'll procrastinate. but remember, U'r life is determined by Allah. What if there is no more later for you? you're gonna regret." yeah so im not going to bow to the Devil's wishes.... From now on... i'll try not to let anything stop me from doing what i have to do.

 

"Oh Allah, Please give your slave strength to do her prayers with full of sincerity, please guide her, showing her the right path and defend her from all evil doings for your the Listener, please listen to her prayers for she only bows amd kneels down to you. Let her be safe in her afterlife. Let there be fruits for her in your Heaven. Place her to be one of your true believers. Oh Mighty Allah, Please stop chaos in this world which is temporary. Show your followers the true path they should take. For we, your followers, are weak without you guidiance. Please shower our prophet Muhammad s.a.w and his family with the royalty which they should get. Amin."

 

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A new friend

Ok... Azeez is over... now it's a new guy... Name: Mas'ud... haven't seen
him thou. he's quite a nice guy... i'm not sure about his personality... but
he seems to be a family-oriented person which is good... i look forward to
meeting him someday. suddenly he appeared when i'm sad because of how azeez
treated me. the first time we chatted. he asked for my number. in my mind, i
was like what the heck? but then the next time we chatted which was
yesterday, i gave him my no. suddenly he log off... rupenye dier tolong
nenek dier masak ayam untuk kenduri... wah rajin nye... hehe... he's from
loyang sec and now posted to ITE tamp. when i asked him where he was posted
to after the 'o's, he was hesistant to tell cos he was afraid i don't want
to be friends with an ITE guy. but i think its ok. not all guys are bad.
people make mistakes too... the most important thing is to learn from their
mistakes right? i think i'll just layan this guy since he's nice to me. i
hope he won't put me down... hmms... next week is school holidays for the
budak2 kecil... wah action sey mentang2 dah nak masuk poly. oh ya niwaes for
those who dunno, i got into TP. course: environment design... my first
choice! haha... tapi org aus dun have holiday...maklumlah, negara diorg mana
sama dengan negara kita... i think i need to see the doctor. asal makan
banyak, mesti nak muntah... i think my stomach can't handle alot of food.

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weeee!!!!

great! now i have a new easy way to blog. Thru e-mail! why didn't i ever
think of that??? anyway, now i dont have feelings for any guys at all. i'm
hurt for the umpteenth time. but my heart is still open for guys who r
decent? haha wth. anyway, i cant sleep properly yesterday. woke up ard 3 or
4 and heard strange noises outside the window. i can't figure it out. it's
either a duck or maybe a dog barking? i dunno. but all i'm sure is that it's
strange. the sound seems far. i though maybe a pontianak maybe beside me.
what rubbish. anyway. i guess i'm back to my old ways... understanding the
Qur'an,,, i think i'm gonna focus on snooker and some fun activities.
haven't got a list yet. but i think i'm gonna study 'ilmu' from my father
and mak cik. my cuz danial, widya, my kakak sedare nyer tunang pon nak
blajar ilmu. widya called us weirdos... hahaha wth... niways, i had another
bad dream. I had to marry my friends father!!! argh!!! eww.... no way!
imagine me being a mother to a kid of my age??? like wth.. im not going to
sleep with the window open anymore. i usually close the window at my room.
but nowadays i always burn the midnight oil. so my adiks will conquer my bed
and i have to sleep at my mom's bed. since my father wont be coming home
till morning. oh ya. my father got a new job... yay! he's working as a
supervisor at sentosa cove... thanks to my resume! lol... i hope i can
continue blogging as long as this com wont break down and i also hope i'll
get my lappy toppy sooner!

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puisi untuk mu

Badai menimpa dan menyebabkan perpisahan ini terjadi. Walau bertapa hampa
dan lukanya hatiku, kau tidak akan pernah dapat mengubatinya semula seperti
apa yang kau janjikan. Kecurigaanku terhadapmu telah membuktikan bahawa kau
tidak seperti apa yang kau katakan. Kau selalu berkata dan berazam untuk
menjadi insan yang lebih baik dari dulu kala. Engkau tetap berdegil walau
seribu kali ku bisikan kedalam jiwamu bahawa persahabatan ini tidak akan
kemana-mana.
Sekarang kau telah pergi meninggalkan aku. Kau pergi bersama teman
istimewamu. Aku selalu berharap sebelum ini agar kau dapat merubah
sangkaanku terhadapmu. Tetapi kau tetap seperti dulu. Walau berapa kali ku
maafkan mu, tetap kau tidak sedar dan kau gagal untuk belajar dari kesilapan
mu itu. Kau tidak sedar bahawa selama ini aku menguji tahap kesabaran,
kesetiaan dan keteguhanmu. Tetapi kau telah menunjukkan bahawa kau sama
seperti beberapa lelaki yang telah ku temui di masa lampau. Mogaku dapat
mencari kebahagiaan disamping jejaka yang lain yang dapat menambat hatiku
yang parah.

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