Star-Karat

Guess what?

I was 40 minutes late for driving lesson today... o_O

Possibly the most expensive driving lesson I've had.

It cost me:

$24 - Taxi fare (to and fro plus booking fee)
$12 - Ezlink/nets flashpay (Lost it...)
$65 - Lesson

Thanks uh eh!

Hello imaginary world.

I had my 5th driving lesson today :) How fun! I've always looked forward to my driving lessons. I enjoy driving 149. I don't know why... Though, It stalls most of the time (The engine stalled twice just now!) But I feel like we are one! haha... how poetic.

I signed up for the One Team Package. Comfort Driving Centre offers this package whereby you just add $5 to your driving lessons, and you'll get a fixed car, with max. of 5 instructors. I have two fixed instructors. These instructors are chosen based on their competent teaching techniques. One of my instructor is a Malay (Mr. H), and one is Chinese (Mr.D). I prefer Mr.H teaching techniques. He finds my faults and then he will tell me the correct procedures. Mr.D's technique is acceptable too. He will tell me the correct technique first and then we will practice and practice until we get it right.

So far, I love my time table structure. One week with Mr.H, 2 lessons. Another week would be with Mr.D... Just for 1 lesson. So I have the daring instructor who lets me drive like a smart-alack for two lessons, and then there's one lesson with the instructor who make me do the same thing over and over again (like left turns only) for 100 minutes as practice. Its like the secondary school days where the teacher gives the students lots and lots of TYS to complete!

Anyway, that's about driving. I have a medical check-up tomorrow and I am quite excited for it, I don't really know why. But at the same time, I feel like... I don't really want to go because I am scared. :D (But its free!)

Can I wake up at 12 later?

Hello imaginary readers Has been so long since I've last blogged... So I guess no body would've realise that I had updated :) Its been a few months upon graduation and I've just passed my Basic Theory Test in less than 4 minutes with a score of 50/50 :D Gonna break another personal record for ftt. If possible... hehe. Anyway, I'm taking my Class 3 license now. YES. 3. Not 3A, thank you very much :) I made a best friend at work :) his name is Riz. I think he is gay. He calls my boyfriend 'sayang'. Hehe. Maybe, my boyfriend is... nvm.

I miss Mama Nur. I wanted to call her but I get too occupied with work and driving and myself! Even Bf is angry with me today cos I did not say much during our phone conversation just now. :(

And this guy from facebook is freaking me out!

I just ate Ginger.

Ouh how I despise the taste of ginger and now its reeking all over my mouth! Anyway, here was my day. Since it was my off day, I decided to cancel my plans with Raudhah just to go out with my family. Very much sorry Raudhah. We spent half a day at e!hub. Bowling, accompanied by Magic Wok. Been so long since I've had dinner with my family. :) After which we went to Zone X and spend a lot of $$$ on nothing. But I got a yellow elmo from the happy holder. You know that thing which moves and picks toys and throw them down the chute. Very funny you know. And that thing, is a wallet stripper. hahah. We enjoyed the arcade so much that we almost forgot about the time! So when we got tired, we went to FairPrice and got ourselves Ice creams. Magnum gold, almond and Ecuador. So that was my 'off day'. Proud of myself :P

Kemana kau menghilangkan diri

I had just made someone's life miserable (hehehe!) But I'll make it up to him tomorrow... I wonder how he would react tomorrow cos I intend to rebond my hair... Mama (His mom) suggested that I rebond my hair so that my hair would look kept and I would have a nicely executed bob. Right now, its all in a mess... Cute thing is, Mama suggested that I do this before he comes back from camp. Alah! Cute kan his mom. hahaha, (mak angkat aku jugak) Anyways, I am taking my Driving License at last! BTT would be 13 July (I know, so far away) and then right now, I have done all four e-trial tests, that I am afraid I would forget the answers by then. Hmph. Insyallah I won't :) Right now, I'm having prac lessons :) and I am so Enjoying it! K thats all for now, Cya later alligator!

One of 'd' Best Date

Current Obsession: Kid Nation (reality tv series)

Had a great 'date' just now :) Could say that I went home yesterday just to sleep for 7 hrs and then woke up to see him again :) hehehe.

Went to watch robin hood with his family... and his aunt whom we call mummy. Daddy and hykel followed to. (Btw thanks daddy for the ride *winks*) I slept during the whole show cos I was so tired! I did not sleep the night before, watching Kid Nation on youtube. Aiyo. hantu sey.

Then today was my 'once a month date' thing. 8D Initial plan was to go lilliputt to play golf... hehehe. But, it changed totally! Noon: Watched 'The Last Song' which made me cried like crazy! Then we went to Big Splash by bus. Stopped at the wrong bus stop and we had to walk!!! like more than 1 km can? *faints* Then we went to the lilliputt to find that the place was 'infested' with small human beings! *dies* In the end, we felt like it was embarrassing to even be in that place. hahaha. 'Trust me sayang, adults can play too!!' So we chilled at KFC instead... (WTT!) Still, at KFC, there was a family with kids. Not that I hate kids or anything. But I get pissed off by the parents cos I feel like they are teaching the kids wrongly... How can 10 kid shout at the same time? And all from different directions, how to eat in peace? (I know, how can I expect every kid to behave like my 4 angels?) Anyway, we cabbed to parkway parade cos I am an idiot at routes. Seriously. And then we searched for a barber like mad. Walked the whole parkway parade to find a QB house or similar to that cos he needed to cut his hair before book in or his weekends would be busted. So we went to marine promenade, the shop houses opposite PP.

Got his hair cut, then we went back to PP. And it was raining! I hate the rain nowadays. They are so indecisive. I should blame it on myself and the other human beings for making the earth sick such that the weather becomes unpredictable. Sorry mother earth, I will learn to become a 'planet vegan'. SAVE MOTHER EARTH!!!

Ok, now. We went through the rain and i was freezing like mad, so I bought myself a very nice green 'dress' which color reminds me of my secondary school skirt. hahaha, But nolah, this one is much better looking. And I changed into that... So that I won't freeze to death *so exaggerating!* Then we had bbq stingray which is not that nice (O'braims better) and then guess what? When we took the lift down to the L1, there was a DAMN HUMONGOUS QB HOUSE!!! We were like 'WHAT???' *high pitch* God knows the feeling. Then we cabbed back home... and when I reached home, I started on our scrapbook :) Can't wait to show him. Hahaha... Things that I propose to do that he made me do that I do for him!~

I want you to be here

Maybe if you were by my side, It would be much easier for me to sleep every night.
Shall I blame you for being the cause of these dark eye circles and eye bags?

Can I listen to your voice every morning but hate you for calling me late at night?
and then, that would mean that I am being selfish now, aren't I?

I can't believe it. I can't accept the fact. That even after 1 year, 5 months and 10 days, you still make me think of you... Like as if I 'hypothetically' fell in love for the first time! (It took me months to really fall for you ;) )

I hate you for making me feel this way.
Seriously :P

*I will complain to MinDef and ask "why my boyfriend have to stay-in everytime?!"*

Sorry girls, this might bore you!

Apart from topics about NS, what else bores girls like ZizyZieza to the max of the core? Soccer! Hahha. Can't believe it but I am so gonna blog about the premier league tonight. hahaha. Girls, it might help if you put in some interest into topics that guys are interested in... Especially if you wanna have great quality fun and healthy enjoyment with your partners! :) (Who am i? a love psych? Oh i forgot i used to work as an assistant for the Mahkamah Syarie consultants... JK! )

Every guy in FB is like going crazy about how Chelsea won. Some can't accept the fact as they rooted on MU. I rooted for chelsea ever since I got together with my BF. Used to be a MU fan. Whatever he likes, I will like (sub-consciously) So now I root for the Blues :) Sweet kan? Hehe. *Crazy*

Anyway, Chelsea 8-0! woo hoo baik per! The new paper's prediction was accurate :) Ok here's the funny, embarrassing and *slap forehead* moment.

We were at the shop I think, then we talked about Soccer. hahahaha. Mama (hakam's mom) and Hakam were talking about Jose Mourinho and Inter and what not. After their long conversation about how Jose won some titles and gained controversial popularity due to his outspoken nature, I cut in and asked "eh? Jose menang berape Goal?". And they were stunned. Mama was like "Amyra tau tak Jose tu siape?" I was like... 'Obviously I dunno. I thought they were talking about a Brazillian player or something like that. ' Then they laughed at me... and now it's becoming a joke. hahaha. Whenever they talk about soccer, there will be some one asking " So berape goal Jose score?" Ya Allah, I wanna dig a hole and hide my face!

"Hehe... Cute lah you ni" ~That's all you can say?! Thanks eh! :/

I give a salute to mama cos she is more knowledgeable than me about stuff like this. Soccer and current affairs regarding hollywood... Ah, What do I know? Business and politics?! Like how Sands are doing well in Singapore but not in Las Vegas? And how people are going bonkers over the MOE's mother tongue assessment weightage reduction... I feel so old already... BLEAH!

btw, I'm starting to get tired of the Berita Harian. Don't you think that they have nothing to talk about actually?

Please accept me for who I am

I may sound Arrogant, Snobbish, Defiant, Ungrateful...
But those are what you want to hear, what you want to see...
I am not like that. I know. I want to be the best and I try.
I can't be perfect, and even if i have the credibility, life is not that fair for me.
I only depend on Him and it's hard for me to express how grateful I am to you.
I know I am lucky to have such great people who care for me in my life.
It seems like there are a lot of people who has my interest at heart. And I am so grateful for that. :)
Alhamdulillah.
I just want to say that, whatever I do, I will always pray that it is good for me, and I know. And I will always think before I act. That is a promise. So please, stop worrying. I want to live my life in full contentment before I die.

You have to learn to let go.

I find it funny. How I am still so lonely yet I still feel care from people. Maybe they care for me but they just don't support what I do... Or they don't believe in me? Or are they scared of the truth? Or am I just being ignorant? Or what??

I am so confused and no one's helping me. You know what is pulling me together? You should have guessed by now if you have been paying attention. :)

:))

Today went out fine... Although it started with a shock.
Papa (Mama nur's husband) was admitted to the hospital so we rushed to Johor at 8.30 am in the morning. We only reached Johor at around 11 am and then we had breakfast at ayah's favourite spot before we went on to Hospital Sultanah Aminah. I felt so grateful for being born in Singapore. Even though I support the opposition party, hahahaha. I must commend on the health and security system here. So different from Malaysia. Ayah said the situation there reminded him of Singapore a couple of years ago where the health system was not as 'standard' as now. I pity papa. I wish he could be admitted to a Singapore hospital instead. :(

But on the bright side, today could be one of the best days of my life :) Because I got to spend my time with the people dear to me!

Am I romantic or what?

I have a problem.
I want to do alot of things, but I don't know where to start.
This is a big problem.
Ok. Always do what I use to do.
Write it all down and plan what to do first.

1) Start collating pictures before next outing with him cos if not, Im gonna get wallup-ed!
2) Ask mama nur for my aunt's number. I need to take that graduation gown.
3) Memorise Surah Yasin
4) Finish those books. So that I can buy new ones.
5) Which reminds me, I should sign up for that Times Bookstore card.
6) Gain more weight!

Now that I've wrote it down, it seems like my mind is straightened out. :)

Yeay! Now I miss him and I want to give him a subtle surprise this weekend when he comes back :)

*Im hungry btw. Should wake my sister up to accompany me to cook up something for the tummy.

The Power Of Love

"Eyes. Heart. Mind.
The best gifts from God.
But which one would you use most?"

You inspire me.
It's like the light at the end of the tunnel.
With you smiling at me,
it makes me pinch myself a thousand times
Wondering if I'm in a dream.

When the hearts break,
I know I would be spared.
Cos everytime before we could,
We knew parting couldn't be beared.

I just love the way you tried to get me when no one else could.
How you made me fell, stutter everytime we meet.
And everytime I wonder, if you were an angel from above.
Guiding me through my thick and thin.
Being patient with me, even when I'm in the brink of madness.
Temperamental. That's what the dictionary would define.
And You turned my world into divine. Something I had never seen.
And I don't remember loving anyone as much as I do to you.
You just turn me into someone new.
And I always wonder if that is heaven sent.

Love is blind, I know.
Love is pure, I see.
Love is eternal, I feel.
Loving is not using your eyes or mind.
It is and has always been~ in your heart.
Unconditionally.

PS:
Amy Loves You.

How's life right now?

Missed my laptop! My cousin kidnapped it for like three days?! Ok now that its back safe and sound, I am so relieved.

Ibu's friend came to our house and asked me what am I doing now? Trust me, that question is like a taboo question for me because I don't really know how to answer. And people being people, just want to hear what they want to hear. So just now, my answer sounded like this.

Ibu's friend: Dik kerje kat mana?
Me: Kat Sengkang
Ibu's friend: Sales eh?
Me: Ya... (Something like that, I guess)
Ibu's friend: Oh, Buat ape? Makanan eh? You masak ke serve?
Me: Yah. uhm... I think both kot?

Then I smiled and I walked out of the house, off to work.

I don't know why now I feel like I can face the world. I must say, it is a good feeling. Like I know what I want. And I know it. I just know it. Like I don't feel uncertain anymore.

You know. Everybody has dreams. Get married, have a good life, retire peacefully and what not. Mine is so simple. Yet, its the most difficult. Be a good muslim. Heaven is my strive. But im going so far away from it, I don't think I can do it. Even now, I feel like I should put a halt to my 'hijab plan'. I don't think i am ready to bring the 'muslimah' title. He is not ready, So I can't be ready.

I don't really know why, but I think I am making things difficult for myself. :) Funny. I really think that I am achieving personal and communal success through this choice of path. Working with my Godparents who happens to be both my boyfriend's and best friend's parents. I feel like, when I am with them, I learn so much about life and being a muslim. That's what I like, It's exposure, if you could put it that way. Of course, my parents would like me to work in a design firm. But I just have no interest in design anymore. I think design is an utter waste of time if it were to be made as a full time job. I think I'll do more facebook than I'll do working. Trust me. And it leads to an unhealthy lifestyle while meeting different snobbish people from the other companies and having to work with them. I just don't see it in myself.

I have fun while working at O'braim. And I learn... A lot. Be it about life, be it about happiness... Sometimes marriage and a lot about business. Hahaha. And most importantly, I learn about how I should think and bring myself. What should I display, and what is good/bad.

Smile, and you will receive lots of smiles back. Frown and a huge argument awaits. Just don't laugh like crazy, else a slap awaits you. hahaha. Die die die. Different people with different attitudes and different perception. I tell you, my life is a very entertaining one. I can blog about what happens on that day for a whole night and still not finish blogging. The controversies, the jokes... The tears and laughter... All in one.

I'm still wondering why Ayah Aim likes my maternal grandmother. maybe its because she is very simple? She is the only one who supports me when I made the decision to work for O'braim. Trust me.

Ok so till we meet again,

Salam :)

I'm bored

I want to post some pictures that I took, but its so... Anyway.
just put it as, I am lazy to upload the pictures. Will upload soon okay!

So, The last time we went out was when we went to Sentosa.
We had fun with the luge... haha. Saw RWS, Had a really fun time...
Sad thing we couldn't do SegWay. Okay! I am so going to do SegWay and megazip next time.
But next month's outing would be Lily putt. Hmm Gonna check out if they have a website.

And Darling wants to do Ice Skating? Hhaha. Where? Not Explorer Kid's for sure...
Okay! Lets do some research shall we?

I miss him, I always think of him after all that has happened just now :)

It's near 4 and I've yet to sleep!

I know I've promised you not to vent my anger at you. But oh dear, I couldn't help myself. I hate it when I do that to you, because I know you do not deserve it. We both know. After telling you all that was hidden in my tiny heart, I can't believe you trust me. I did not expect that. I've never felt love so strong from someone else except from my mother or aunt. But you trusted me, you believed me and forgave me. You even told me you would protect me... I feel so grateful. So honoured, so blessed to be with you.

I will never bring myself to betray you or hurt you. This, I promise myself :) Allah has His ways of working His magic.

I love you. I know you know :)

Nenek's birthday

It's nenek's birthday today, and I had a surprise for her which made her almost cry... I think, that was the best birthday present I gave to anyone in my life, accidentally. When nenek saw it, she hugged me real tight. I was moved, almost in the verge of tears :) Will post some pictures soon.

Dan aku fikir-fikir, dan terus memikir

Ya Allah,
Dugaan apa yang telah kau berikan kepadaku?
Apa kah hikmah disebalik semua ini?
Kejadian-kejadian yang berlaku,
Sumpah setiaku kepadaMU?

Ya Zahir,
Kau yang memandang segalanya,
Namun hanya kau lah yang tahu segala yang tertulis di benak ini.
Lindungi lah hambaMu yang kian lemah,
Dibaur debuan asap neraka mengaburi mata.

Aturkanlah langkahku, untuk meniti titian yang kian rapuh
Bagaikan berjalan di atas seutas benang,
merentas langit yang tinggi,
Sungguh ku tak berdaya.

Rintangan dan badai yang harus ku lalui,
Demi Yang Hayy, Demi Yang Qayyum.
Akan ku harungi dengan penuh jiwa dan raga.

Life...

Life has never felt better I guess.... No stress about school, no stress about not having enough $$$... hahahaha.(Gerek Kan)... But then, as I move on, new challenges arise and I have to face them one by one. No matter how tough, no matter how disheartening, no matter how discouraging!

I am so happy today because mr.H is on luggage off tomorrow. :) So, we'll be going out with his family :)) Yeay! (I can't believe it, I had just came back from having supper with his fam an hr ago. And now I can't wait to see them? hahahah)

But seriously, I so can't wait. We are going to Vivo tmr I guess. :)) SHOPPING! ahhahah. (Like I shop every day, nowadays! Hello?!) Im enjoying life while waiting for graduation. :) Im thinking of working for O'braim and at the same time do some freelance (like as if that freelance is going to happen!) but hey! You never know. Wealth and fortune is in God's hands. :)

so, Tawakallah.

Insomnia

I still cant sleep and its near to 5. I think I am stressed out or depressed? or just simply nocturnal? I wanted to watch santau but was too scared. haha. So suspense. Shall just wait for tomorrow.

Ok, back to why I may be stressed. My parents want me to continue with my studies. Thats not the main problem. The main problem is that they do not seem to understand my dreams. My realistic dreams. They want me to have my own design firm. They want me to embark to Malaysia or Australia. But I will have to do that alone? I'm not an 'alone' type of person. Why can't they see that?

My realistic dreams include managing my own restaurant.

i don't know.

uncertain.