There was one moment in my life when I knew I was an inspiration to some people. I treasured that moment and I will remember those people all my life.
But now, I realize... among that many people who love/admire me, there are also others who hate/dislike me.
I admit I am a changed person now. But I am only changed because of school. (Wait, now I am blaming school??) Yes, I am blaming school... Plus myself. I don't do nothing else except for blaming myself now, do I? But do I have a choice?? No. I still have to blame myself. All I can do now is bring another secondary factor to join the blame.
Yesterday... I wondered. (Well, I was kinda contemplating before going to sleep, though I prefer contemplating in the commode.) I started wondering if I am a changed person. I was so busy, I did not have time to look at the mirror and see who am I, until yesterday. When I decided not to touch my 'assignments' or lappy. And I just sat down in the mirror and looked at myself.
Well, maybe I changed physically a bit... I gained weight... yada yada yada... But I was more interested in my inner self. Where am I? Who am I? Where's the me that I used to be? Again, is it because of school? Friends... change of company, mission... till I lost myself.
Pathetic. I prefer to be the old self. Someone whom people look up to. But I like being myself now. I feel more confident being my new self. Well. Maybe I should start incorporating those two together. :D
Shouldn't I? Be more aware of my surroundings... Socialize a bit more. But still be me.
Thus, I will pick up those small bits and pieces of me and be a better me.
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